Well, today I am six weeks and I think the pregnancy hormones are hitting me hard. We have an appt tomorrow and I am terrified that we will find that the baby is not developing . . . I almost cried about it just now but then I realized I was just being hormonal.
We plan on telling our parents at the end of July. We are going camping with my parents the first week of August, and I feel like, by then, it will be obvious that I am slightly pregnant--hehe. So James and I plan on trying to have dinner with his parents and Andrew and Natalya sometimes at the end of July, and telling them then, and then going down to my parents house so James can drop me off for camping, and having dinner with them and telling them all then. I am really excited for them to know, but also just to be in that place. I will be 8 weeks then and the risk of m/c drops to 2%. I will feel so thrilled when I am not terrified any more, hehe.
Funnily enough, one of my coworkers/good friends is also pregnant, and probably due within days of me. She told everyone at the bar last week and this also gave me a hormonal pregnant lady reaction where I was stressing about whether or not to tell them. But I honestly just feel like it is too early. I don't want to get everyone all excited only to disappoint later. If we do suffer a m/c and I need support, I will seek it at that time. But I feel like once you've told people you are pregnant, to tell them you are having a m/c is to disappoint them, I don't want that.
Expecting our Little Brother in November!
Monday, July 13, 2009
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
It's Finally Happened
We found out on Saturday morning that I was pregnant. Here's my chart for that cycle:
Actually, on Friday morning, I had a VERY light line, and even though I got a negative digital, I just knew it was really it. I called James at work to tell him. "I think I got a positive pregnancy test." But, I (we) didn't want to get too excited until I (we) actually saw the digital.
The next morning, there was a slightly darker light line, and the digital popped up pregnant. It was Saturday so James was home. I had woken up before 6, I was nervous with excitement to test. When the digital said pregnant, I woke up James, and handed it to him.
When he first tried looking at it, he was wakening up and clearing his eyes so he could even see it. When he realized what it said, he hugged and kissed me--he was so happy. We went back to sleep after that, but we were really excited.
After that, it was still so early that I doubted it kind of, but sure enough, the tests keep getting darker--and a blood test confirmed it yesterday. I started using progesterone cream on Monday morning after talking to the doctor and hearing that they wouldn't see me until the next day. I had waited all weekend, and I was scared. So I have been using it morning and night since then.
But my beta numbers and prog numbers (hehe) on Tuesday were both good. He didn't say what they were, but I guess they were okay.
He told me not to tell anyone about it yet in case we lose it. That's what we were planning on doing, but I can tell already that it will be harder than I thought it would to keep the secret. My Mom and Amy already had weird conversations with me asking me what is going on with it. Weird as in, I had to lie to them to avoid telling them--I feel weird lying and making up stories even though we really do want to wait to tell people, which is okay!
I think James especially wants to enjoy some time with this as our special secret before we are sharing it with the world.
Anyway, my symptoms up to this point have been tiredness and hunger, although the hunger hasn't been quite as great the last couple days. I think it helps that I have been practicing every morning since I found out (except yesterday). I could tell this morning that the qi was building up again--I felt so disconnected for so long, and it felt like I wasn't pulling energy from the air--it almost reminds me of an asthma attack--that you breathe and get no oxygen, so matter how hard you suck.
I guess I was pretty disconnected. I might have not gone to a meeting since the last bimonthly event (two months ago)! Crazy.
Anyway, the hunger hasn't been as much, and I think part of that is that I was starting to have cravings--again, my body wasn't absorbing nutrients efficiently from the food--just like I couldn't draw energy from the air--I suppose it is all the same basic thing in different ways.
But I have felt so good today--I felt as if I was really picking up something when I practiced this morning--and also getting rid of other things I didn't need. It was good, and today, I have had so much energy, I got so much done, even without adderall or even tea. I think if I keep up this practicing, I will have a great summer, a great pregnancy, and a great school year next year.
I guess that is it for today. :-)
Actually, on Friday morning, I had a VERY light line, and even though I got a negative digital, I just knew it was really it. I called James at work to tell him. "I think I got a positive pregnancy test." But, I (we) didn't want to get too excited until I (we) actually saw the digital.
The next morning, there was a slightly darker light line, and the digital popped up pregnant. It was Saturday so James was home. I had woken up before 6, I was nervous with excitement to test. When the digital said pregnant, I woke up James, and handed it to him.
When he first tried looking at it, he was wakening up and clearing his eyes so he could even see it. When he realized what it said, he hugged and kissed me--he was so happy. We went back to sleep after that, but we were really excited.
After that, it was still so early that I doubted it kind of, but sure enough, the tests keep getting darker--and a blood test confirmed it yesterday. I started using progesterone cream on Monday morning after talking to the doctor and hearing that they wouldn't see me until the next day. I had waited all weekend, and I was scared. So I have been using it morning and night since then.
But my beta numbers and prog numbers (hehe) on Tuesday were both good. He didn't say what they were, but I guess they were okay.
He told me not to tell anyone about it yet in case we lose it. That's what we were planning on doing, but I can tell already that it will be harder than I thought it would to keep the secret. My Mom and Amy already had weird conversations with me asking me what is going on with it. Weird as in, I had to lie to them to avoid telling them--I feel weird lying and making up stories even though we really do want to wait to tell people, which is okay!
I think James especially wants to enjoy some time with this as our special secret before we are sharing it with the world.
Anyway, my symptoms up to this point have been tiredness and hunger, although the hunger hasn't been quite as great the last couple days. I think it helps that I have been practicing every morning since I found out (except yesterday). I could tell this morning that the qi was building up again--I felt so disconnected for so long, and it felt like I wasn't pulling energy from the air--it almost reminds me of an asthma attack--that you breathe and get no oxygen, so matter how hard you suck.
I guess I was pretty disconnected. I might have not gone to a meeting since the last bimonthly event (two months ago)! Crazy.
Anyway, the hunger hasn't been as much, and I think part of that is that I was starting to have cravings--again, my body wasn't absorbing nutrients efficiently from the food--just like I couldn't draw energy from the air--I suppose it is all the same basic thing in different ways.
But I have felt so good today--I felt as if I was really picking up something when I practiced this morning--and also getting rid of other things I didn't need. It was good, and today, I have had so much energy, I got so much done, even without adderall or even tea. I think if I keep up this practicing, I will have a great summer, a great pregnancy, and a great school year next year.
I guess that is it for today. :-)
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