Expecting our Little Brother in November!

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Sunday, July 24, 2011

Old School Sunday: Tent Life

If you haven't heard about my blog series "Old School Sunday", read the back story!

And if you want, catch up on what you missed (read from the bottom up!)

Getting to the end of the spring semester of my sophomore year of college . . . we had started a tent city on the campus green in protest of the "War on Terror" invasion of Iraq. We started out there as soon as we went in, March 19th, and we stayed out there for the rest of the semester . . . we might have even done it again in the fall, I forget (maybe we'll find out! Hehe).

Anyway, my poem about tent life . . .

10th April 2003
Current Mood: grateful
Current Music: Radiohead--2+2=5

We started this tent city in protest
A protest against the destruction of life
But I feel our purpose here has changed.
Every moment a reaffirmation
Of what life is.

I denounce your television
I denounce your stereo
I denounce your perfumes
I denounce your wardrobe
I denounce your money
(the millions spent on nothing,
billions paid and earned on wars of destruction)
I denounce your petty capitalist materialism

For this earth holds joys beyond your dollars
I denounce your ability to buy happiness
(war for peace)
I claim this happiness on behalf of the people
the animals
the trees the plants
the rocks the mountains
the skies the grounds

I claim this happiness and I will share it
for free
If you try to pay me I will laugh (priceless!)
If you try to kill me I will laugh (worthless!)

Thursday, July 21, 2011

I am Getting Sucked into a Teething Vortex (and other Problems)

So, I REALLY wanted to post an update at least for james 8 month birthday and also post his 7 month one which I never did. But I haven't had time/energy. Why?

Crawling and pulling up and teething AND hand foot n mouth disease. Not to mention a bunch of other things. Which maybe would be fine, but . . .

My house is a baby death trap! Not really but we have four cats and there is fur and hair floating everywhere (not to mention animal bits that go unfound, ehhh), I have always sucked at cleaning (esp vacuuming/sweeping/mopping--th​ough I'm getting better fast) . . . not to mention that James is ripping up the floor in the kitchen, so there are bits of linoleum and god knows what else scattered everywhere . . . basically, I can't let james in hardly any spaces by himself because he is CRAWLING FAST and pulling up on EVERYTHING.

I finally MOSTLY baby-proofed my porch, so we are good out there and I can watch him there from the kitchen or laundry room, but I really want to make more of the house accessible to him so that I don't have to watch him every second. The living room is sort of okay, and our bedroom is nearly baby-proofed, but the rest of the house needs to be done.

Another problem is that he's been super fussy from teething, and he gets up SO early, awake by 5:30/6, I put him down for his first nap now (by going on a walk) before 8 am, and then he hasn't been falling asleep until like . . . 9 some nights? I feel like I have no time to myself, he's nursing so much in the middle of the night lately, I'm just exhausted.

So, even when he's napping, I'm too tired to babyproof or clean half the time. Siiigh. And when he's awake, well, I just have to watch him 24/7 because my house is a deathtrap, as I mentioned. And I won't even go into the fact that he's CONSTANTLY falling and hitting his head (with all the pulling up). I feel like an awful mother. Gah!!!

AND I also haven't had time to do any of the things that make me feel like me--blogging, going on IV, taking pictures, I just feel overwhelmed. :(

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Old School Sunday: Things Start to Get Better with my Parents

If you haven't heard about my blog series "Old School Sunday", read the back story!

And if you want, catch up on what you missed (read from the bottom up!)

Getting to the end of the spring semester of my sophomore year of college . . . here I write about how I will go to my first Yan Xin Qigong event . . .

2nd April 2003
1:13am: Email to my Parents
Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Norm and Sal on Guitar--Creep by Radiohead

Dear Mom and Dad,

Mom wrote me and told me to write. Well, tonight I went to a program in the South Study Lounge that was organized by the Hall director. It was a discuss and exchange of ideas concerning the war. The head of the honors dept was there to assist, and it was run by a Philosophy professor and a philosopy Grad student. It was really interesting. We split into groups of five and discussed the issues. Then we tried to come to some points of consensus and discussed as a large group. The head of the honors dept was in my group and I met her and talked to her a lot during the discussion. She seemed impressed that I was so informed, and she said that it was important for busy college kids to take time out of their days to be responsible and informed citizens. I thought that you would be interested to hear that.

Also, this thing I read about, very interesting. "British and American coalition forces are using depleted uranium (DU) shells in the war against Iraq and deliberately flouting a United Nations resolution which classifies the munitions as illegal weapons of mass destruction." Great Britain's Sun Herald

So, how is everything with you guys? I tried to talk to mom yesterday on the IM but she left for some reason . . . Anyway, have you sold any houses? Good luck with that. Read any good books? I've just read Dharma Bums by Jack Kerouac for my literature of the new consciousness Class, and I really liked what it had to say about Buddism. Alot of it sound like what I've been discovering lately. Like I've been thinking about what a soul is, or an aura if you want to think of it like that. Your "Holy Spirit" your soul, your energy, your qi, whatever you want to call it. And How every person has one, but also every tree, every living thing, every object. Everything has and is energy. Everything at the base level is just waves. And How the earth also has an aura, an energy field. It is made by the sun and contained by the earth's gravity And it is huge and powerful and when you lay on the ground and breathe in you can feel it, you know. Like when you sleep outside on the ground you wake up feeling so fresh and healthy. And So all of this means that all of us and our souls or auras are all connected and overlapping with the earth's energy. Which means that self, seperating your aura and your energy out from the rest and labeling it accessable to your mind and control, is all an allusion. And if you choose to think about it differently, the whole earth is just part of and a continuation of yourself. Anyway, so I was thinking this and Dharma Bums really spoke to that and I really liked it. Also, this has a lot to do with what Qi-Gong says--that once we realize that we can access the energy of the earth, that limiting ourselves in anyway is un-necessary. Also, I'm probably going to Yale with Laccone on Saturday. He is going to this qi-gong event, and I asked him last week to ask his qi-gong leader about the possibility of joining the group even tho it is supposed to be closed to membership at this time. And he said that he didn't know if I could join, but he suggested that Laccone bring me to the event on Saturday, because you are allowed to bring interested people if you want to. So I think I am going. I'll let you know how that goes.

So I hope I didn't loose you with the auras and all that. I don't know how much you know about Buddism. So let me know how things are.

Love Adrienne

Later the same day, I talk to my Dad on AIM about my feelings about emerging adulthood and the new responsibilities I've inherited . . .

5:27pm: Honesty
Current Music: Salmun playing Street Spirit by Radiohead

AdriN2001: hey dad
CT Golden1: hi a....hows it going?
AdriN2001: Alright
CT Golden1: good....going to boston withy us and grandma M
AdriN2001: Yeah
CT Golden1: withy us...haha
AdriN2001: You know Dad, I get really stressed out about life and you and mom make me even more stressed out and I wish you wouldn't
AdriN2001: It's like you think I don't worry about these things on my own and so you have to make me worry about them
CT Golden1: you wouldnt get so stressed out if you were more organized and didnt waste so much time on things that arent important
AdriN2001: They are
AdriN2001: The head of the honors dept thinks so
AdriN2001: I have someone to back me up
CT Golden1: do they teach any classes in time management...if so you should take it
AdriN2001: I don't waste time dad
CT Golden1: also try keeping a daytimer and carry it to remind you of things that you have commited to
AdriN2001: I don't watch TV, I don't hang out with people for large amounts of time. I am always trying to prioritize and get as much done as possible
CT Golden1: I can only go by the time I see you...and then you do very,very little
AdriN2001: Well I'm on break
AdriN2001: It's just that I feel sort of helpless
CT Golden1: its that time of the semester that with 17 units you probably pulling your hair out
CT Golden1: tried to warn you against it
AdriN2001: Like I feel like everythings moving at such a fast pace and it's like no one asked me if I wanted to grow up so fast or if I wanted so much responsibility all at once
CT Golden1: I remember when I was in my junior year...I almost quit school...went thru a period of deep depression...hope it wont happen to you
AdriN2001: Well you puttting so much pressure on me certainly isn't helping
CT Golden1: what pressure are you talking about?
CT Golden1: do you want some sound advise?
AdriN2001: No
CT Golden1: fine...whats the presure?
AdriN2001: I just feel like you and mom are always bothering me about money and what job I'm going to have and stuff and I already worry about that stuff CONSTANTLY, and it isn't really good to be told that the unbearable amount that I already worry isn't enough worrying
AdriN2001: Because if I worried any more I would just snap, so I almost feel like you want to push me over the edge or something
CT Golden1: are you having financial problems?
AdriN2001: I don't think so, I mean, I'll be able to give you everything I owe you before the end of the year
CT Golden1: I'm not worried about that....ok...does that make you feel better
CT Golden1: how about if I tell you how proud I am of you...will that make you feel better
AdriN2001: lol
CT Golden1: how much I love you
CT Golden1: Their is one thing I can tell you for sure
AdriN2001: not if you don't mean it and you really aren't pround of me because you think that how I'm doing at school is horrible and that the things that I am passionate about are pointless
CT Golden1: I dont think your doing horrible....I just know that you can do much better
CT Golden1: and I expect someone who is as intelligent as you to do better
CT Golden1: Life is a bitch Adrienne, and if you think collage is tough....just wait....you havent seen anything yet
AdriN2001: Well it's just like I know I can do better too but so much worrying makes me freeze up and not be able to accomplish anything
CT Golden1: try managing a career and raising a family....when your not only responsible for yourself but everyone else too
AdriN2001: I know
AdriN2001: And I'm stressed out about that too
AdriN2001: And it hasn't even happened yet
CT Golden1: you need to stop worrying and start doing what needs to be done....sit down...make a list and remove things from it when they are accomplished
CT Golden1: whats happening is very common
AdriN2001: It's like I used to think of being grownup as walking through a gateway where there are two distinct sides but I'm beginning to realize that things go on and on, and you are never grown-up and suddenly all-knowing but you just sort of stumble through life and somewhere along you grab a wife and kids and you are still blind as ever, and then trying to teach your kids when you never feel like you ever learned anything yourself
CT Golden1: your constantly thinking of what you need to do....just do it and dont do anything else until you get a handle on it....no extra-curricular
CT Golden1: walk......I think you do walk already alot....its good to do
AdriN2001: Alright Dad I have to go but thanks for the advice and thanks for listening
CT Golden1: when I told my father I was going to quit school
CT Golden1: he didnt get mad....he never really would say alot
CT Golden1: he just said that he though I should hang in and finish....he thought I should.....I really miss him
CT Golden1: ok...bye
CT Golden1: love you
CT Golden1 signed off at 4:54:06 PM.

Friday, July 15, 2011

Catching Up

Okay, so I FINALLY caught up with a lot of my online stuff . . .

-I finished uploading the rest of the pictures from Montauk on Facebook. Check them out if we are friends!

-Prepped the rest of June pics to be uploaded.

-Uploaded a pic for this weeks Wordless Wednesday (published retroactively, hehe).

-Caught up with my facebook networks--Dairy Queens (for nursing Moms) and Cutie Pies (my group of babies james' age).

-Caught up somewhat with my I-Village group (my online friends).

-Caught up somewhat on the blogs I read.

And to start it all off, I plugged in my computer and put it back in it's place in the living room. When I'm taking time off from online, a lot of times I just put the computer away and then I don't think of it . . .

Anyway, I think now I will probably be publishing a bit more in the next couple weeks in which we'll mostly be home during the week. So, look out for that!

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Curing Oily Skin with Chemical Free Products (Guest Post)

Thanks to my sister Lauren for being our guest blogger today! She was talking to me recently about this and I asked her if she'd like to write about it! Thanks so much, Lauren!

My family and I come from a long line of Anglo/Euro descent. My dermatologist told me that I just got stuck with the short end of the stick in the skin department, with large pores, very oily skin and dry skin in different areas, a red face, and the proneness to burning, skin cancer, etc. Not too promising. As a result, I always used astringent soaps and cleansers on my face, chest, and back, and moisturized my dry hands and legs. I used a shampoo and conditioner that claimed to strip hair down to help avoid that greasy look. I got lots of acne as a teen and in college my eczema flared out whenever I was under stress. I avoided make-up for fear it would clog my pores, and I used harsh scrubbers and exfoliation on my chest, back, and face to avoid acne. I had bangs and always remember being nervous that they were "clumping" or looking greasy in high school.

Fast forward to less than a year ago, when my sister Marilyn became interested in all-natural beauty and skin products. After I learned that there was no regulation about what gets put in our beauty products, I became very wary of any product I put on my skin, nails, hair, or even on my teeth. Most people know that there is a FDA (Food and Drug Administration) to regulate what is in our foods, a DEP (Dept of Environmental Protection) to protect the earth and water we live off of, even the FCC (Federal Communications Commission) to protect our TVs and radios from being profane, etc etc. In the United States, we are meant to feel that the government is looking out for our well-being. This is obviously an idealistic view. Many of these agencies do not work the way they should. But at least these agencies EXIST. There is no committee, commission, administration, or departments of government that dictate what is safe to put into our cosmetics. This is extremely disturbing to me!

Many people probably do not realize that what you put on your skin is not just sitting on the surface of your body. It is being put on the largest organ, the skin, and is being absorbed into the blood, being run through the brain, heart, liver, kidneys, nervous system, and everywhere in our bodies. That means that what you put ON your body is just as important as what you put IN it.

This was a complete revelation for me. As a health-conscience person, I pay attention to what I eat. I always read labels and try to avoid things I don't recognize or can't pronounce! I began reading the labels of the cosmetics I was using. Even as a person with sensitive skin who uses gentle products, I was astounded to see how many chemicals and unknowns were in basic things like soap, shampoo, conditioner, face wash, and lotion. Additionally, companies do not even have to list ingredients on cosmetic packaging. Many ingredients may not be listed even if there is a list.

Back up to about two winters ago. I developed a rash on my hand that my dermatologist determined was an outbreak of eczema. This can be brought on by stress or by using products that you may be sensitive or allergic to. I had been using Cetaphil lotion which is non-comedogenic (does not clog pores), non-allergenic, and very gentle. He told me that even a product as great as Cetaphil contained chemicals that would keep the water and the oils of the lotion from separating like salad dressing. This was a huge eye-opener to me, and I ceased using lotions. I now only use coconut oil or olive oil as a moisturizer. Fast forward again to this past December.

Marilyn decided to share her new found love--chemical free beauty products--with my family for Christmas presents. She gave me a rosemary mint shampoo bar (Burts Bee's) and a bar of soap (Dr. Bronners). These were the two products she used and recommended. I began using these with gusto! The bar of soap was easy to figure out--it is just like other soap you would use except it has no chemicals and is a castile soap, meaning no animal oils are used (see http://www.drbronner.com/faqs_main.html).

The shampoo bar is another thing. We are used to shampoo that is liquid, shimmery, and smells like a salon. There are different kinds for curly hair, straight hair, frizzy hair, and even ones that can change your hair (flat to volume, frizz to sleek, etc). There are shampoos for colored hair, permed hair, blonde and red hair. It is funny to walk down the aisle of shampoo for me now, because I know that all hair types really only need one kind of shampoo. The shampoo bar I use is not pretty. It is actually kind of ugly. It does not shimmer or smell like a salon. It is actually a greenish brownish dark color, sort of like earwax. Plus, how do you get the shampoo into your hair when it is a bar? Easier than you think, just wet your hair and rub the bar around on your scalp, and maybe rub it between your hands a little to get some foam to then put in your hair. This shampoo has best effect on short or medium length hair, but you can certainly use it with long hair, it might just take more time.

AFTERMATH: After I began using the shampoo bar I found my hair to feel very gummy and dirty. This was not because my shampoo was not working, it was the opposite reason. The bar was helping to get rid of all the chemical build up from the products I used before--Pantene Pro-V Volumizing Shampoo. I found that after a month of using the shampoo bar 2-3 times per week, my hair bounced back to "normal" and appeared healthier and shinier than before. This is because it was not laden with chemicals or oils from the old shampoo that are meant to coat the hairs. I also found that I did not even need to brush my hair. With non-chemical soaps and shampoos, your body naturally "oils" itself. I would try to avoid eating too much oily food because of the nature of my skin. Now, however, I eat tons of olive oil in my cooking and I find my skin and hair to be less oily than before. Because your hair will naturally moisturize, you do not need to use conditioner. I now use the shampoo bar about three times per month. My hair is just not as oily, and the less I wash it the better.

Also, changing your products may cause your skin and hair to act weird. It might look bad for a month. It might feel gummy or dirty. You might even break out or have very dry skin for a few weeks as your skin gets used to the way it is supposed to produce oils. This is all normal and to be expected. If you are dedicated to using exclusively chemical free products, your skin, hair and nails will adjust in time. Some people may need to moisturize externally if they have extremely dry skin and hair. I would recommend eating more olive oil, taking flax seed oil in pill form, shampooing less often, or using a natural moisturizer like coconut oil or aloe vera instead of conditioner.

My sisters and I have also explored the area of waxing. When I shaved, I would get bumps, redness, and using foaming shaving cream dried my skin out. Under my arms was the worst area and I would always feel prickly and uncomfortable there. Waxing can be more expensive and is not for everyone, but I recommend it for anyone that feels discomfort shaving. Waxing is not as painful as it may sound. Additionally, when you wax you are pulling the roots of the hair out and this causes hair to start to re-grow from the beginning. Therefore, when hair grows back it is soft baby-hair, as opposed to when you shave and the hair grows back thicker, sharper, and often darker than before.

I think it is also really great when parents talk to their teenage girls about shaving and what it means and why people do it. Shaving is not something a young girl has to do, and if she waits her hair will probably stay soft and blonde longer. I wish I never started shaving!

To learn about what is really in the cosmetics you may be using, go to the Cosmetics Database here: http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/. Look up any product that is sold in stores, and you can see a list of ingredients as well as a hazard rating.

To learn more about where I learned about these topics, see http://storyofstuff.org/cosmetics/.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Old School Sunday: Worry

If you haven't heard about my blog series "Old School Sunday", read the back story!

And if you want, catch up on what you missed (read from the bottom up!)

In the middle of the spring semester of my sophomore year of college . . . we were newly at War in Iraq, and I am working my butt off to try to pay for school, books, and life . . .

23rd March 2003
Current Mood: depressed

I worry a lot. Sometimes it seems like the only thing I do. It hold me captive, immobile. I can't move. I can't think. I can't act. I just worry. I check the amount of my next paycheck everyday.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Summer Hours

So I was feeling really bad that I've been so MIA, can't even pull a Wordless Wednesday out of my computerbutt after taking 500 pics on vacation . . .

But then I realized that last year, 2010, while I had really awesome months like May (24 posts), October (36 posts), and November (39 posts), that during the summer I made noticebly less posts--19 in June, 16 in July, and a mere SIX in August . . . and if I recall, I was on vacation a lot, and doing lots of stuff outside and with friends and just didn't have as much time for it.

So really I shouldn't be disappointed to see that this is happening once again this summer. As someone that is often a daily blogger I can't help but feel like I am missing something--and I am missing something, to be honest--I love writing, and I like the "cataloging life" sort of aspect of it . . .

But I am gaining other things, and having a great first summer with my boy . . .

So oh well, I decided I'm just having summer hours right now. And that's that. I'll update when I can. :-)

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Old School Sunday: Shame and Nakedness

If you haven't heard about my blog series "Old School Sunday", read the back story!

And if you want, catch up on what you missed (read from the bottom up!)

In the middle of the spring semester of my sophomore year in college, I rant via AIM to a friend . . .

13th March 2003
Current Mood: melancholy

AdriN2001: You know what I think alot?
SCS1NMY574: what?
AdriN2001: How much of life and human interaction is a lie. Just a farce
AdriN2001: People are so afraid
AdriN2001: Afraid to be real, afraid to find what real is
AdriN2001: It's so so stupid
AdriN2001: And TV and media and our parents and our friends and everything and everyone doesn't help
AdriN2001: Everything just makes it worse
AdriN2001: Reinforces its validity
SCS1NMY574: so what are oyu going to do about it?
AdriN2001: I don't know what I can do except live my life to reflect that I reject that
AdriN2001: I reject this worlds stupidity
AdriN2001: I reject this lie
SCS1NMY574: thatsright sista
AdriN2001: haha
AdriN2001: I really hate it though
AdriN2001: SO SO SO much energy is devoted to deception
SCS1NMY574: yeah but its really only natural, to a degree
AdriN2001: It ISN'T
AdriN2001: Why is it?
SCS1NMY574: dont ask me, i just typed it
AdriN2001: ha
AdriN2001: I can't see how it's natural
AdriN2001: Adam and Eve don't naturally feel shame
AdriN2001: They are taught it by the serpent
AdriN2001: Little kids aren't ashamed. They are taught it by society
SCS1NMY574: tru, but this is nothing new, if it stems back so far, to adam and eve, isnt this almost considered inate(sp)
AdriN2001: No that's the whole point of the story
AdriN2001: It isn't innate
SCS1NMY574: whatever, i guess i dont know the story
AdriN2001: Using nakedness as an example, there are plenty of societies where nakedness is perfectly acceptable. There is no shame in nakedness in those societies
AdriN2001: Shame is something we are TAUGHT
AdriN2001: That's SO SO horrible. What a bad and unnecessary emotion
SCS1NMY574: well the majority of what we are taught is so so horrible
AdriN2001: True dat
SCS1NMY574: nothing is really right or great
AdriN2001: Did you know that . . . hold on
AdriN2001: In Figi, there was no TV
AdriN2001: in 1995
SCS1NMY574: where?
AdriN2001: Figi. In 1995--13% of adolescent girls were at risk for developing an eating disorder
AdriN2001: Then Figi got TV
AdriN2001: Over a course of three years, there was a 50% increase in girls who thought they were fat
SCS1NMY574: shizat
AdriN2001: And in 1998--only three years later--39% of adolescent girls were at risk for developing an eating disorder
AdriN2001: Can you imagine how beautiful those little Figi girls were? Are? Can you imagine how lovely their skin is? And emaciated sunken cheeks models have unknowingly convinced them that they are not at all lovely
AdriN2001: That is so sad

Saturday, July 2, 2011


So, that was a big fail in attempting to post an update about our Montauk vacation. We are so busy, so much seems in flux . . . but I promise to do a more substantive update soon. Hope all are well.
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