Happier Things

I am really (this time, I think) actually finally pregnant. I attribute this almost entirely to starting a gluten-free diet in December (and glumetza ). After beginning the gluten-free diet, I got pregnant every month for three months (my rate before the gluten free diet was about once every six months)--only to experience two (more) chemical pregnancies (very early miscarriages) before finally getting pregnant this time, and staying pregnant with the help of the medication progesterone.

Of course, after the miscarriage last summer and a grand total of six chemical pregnancies over the last three years, I have been EXTREMELY hesitant to allow myself to get excited about this. The list of people we have told is ridiculously short: Ophelie, Craig and Yaling (our acupunturist and chiropractor), and of course our doctor. And that's it. One SERIOUS blessing with the miscarriage was that almost no one knew we were pregnant, so we didn't have to deal with the dreaded "untelling". So this time, I haven't told anyone.

BUT! I am ten weeks today and several times we have seen a little heart beating away in our blob of a baby bean. Still though, you can always find the stories of people who miscarried after seeing a heartbeat, so I have remained cautious--and yet as my stomach begins to pooch out and my breasts grow heavy, it is hard to contain my excitement for much longer.

So here is this blog post. Honestly the very short version of things. But I have to start somewhere, and apparently ten weeks is when my excitement has beat out my nervousness in beginning to record my life with baby within.

James is glowing at least as much as me. And again, I cannot stress how ridiculously amazing he has been. I have been on bedrest since about six weeks--I had some spotting and of course my doctor wanted to be as cautious as possible with my history--and I have spent the last month on the couch. And James comes home, and he cooks, and he cleans, with never a hint of a complaint, and when I apologize for not doing more, he hugs me and kisses me, and puts his hand on my belly and says: "You are growing our baby--that's enough." There are no words, right?

Infertility definitely makes you appreciate the fragile miracle that life is. So here is the start, and I am happy to report a happy, moving, heart-beating little baby with an almost complete set of organs here at ten weeks. He graduated just today from being an embryo and is now a fetus. Congrats little Irwin, you are doing great!